Eleven Lessons I Learned Whilst Afflicted with Influenza

1) If you only order pizza once in a blue moon, don't do it when you've got the flu. You won't be able to taste it.

2) You really can't will it away or "work through it." I can't even shower, much less wash the dishes.

3) Aloe/lotion Kleenex are absolutely worth the extra 30 cents.

4) A heating pad on the chest is very comforting when one aches from coughing.

5) Chicken soup seriously has mysterious healing qualities.

6) The world can and does revolve without my directing it.

7) Retail therapy is just as effective when done online, flat on one's back.

8) The absolute best time for hacking up a lung is 2:00am, 2:10am, 2:13am... repeat every three-ten minutes for approximately three hours.

9) Hot tea clears the mind as well as the sinuses for a few minutes. It's temporary relief, but most welcome, nonetheless.

10) If we had a lot more money, I could run an awesome micro-dairy with artisanal cheeses aged to perfection in our custom-designed cheese cave... all while dressed in stunning dresses and a tasteful strand of pearls (see #7).

11) My husband loves me. A lot. (See #'s 2-10)

Feel free to add your own in the comments...